


Without Reason

by supershadsy



Series: Limit Breaker [10]
Category: Final Fantasy VII, Super Smash Brothers
Genre: M/M, Pain
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2016-05-22
Updated: 2016-05-22
Packaged: 2018-06-09 22:39:07
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 7,436
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/6926692
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/supershadsy/pseuds/supershadsy
Summary: <blockquote class="userstuff">
              <p>After years of living together in the Smash mansion, Cloud is suddenly transported back home.</p><p>A story told in snapshots.</p>
            </blockquote>





	Without Reason

**Author's Note:**

> The title of this fic is taken directly from ["Without Reason" by The Fray,](https://www.dropbox.com/s/e3onj7npdcdk54r/04%20Without%20Reason.mp3) and relates heavily to the work.
> 
> This is told in snapshots--if you're aquainted with [_Jumper_ 's "memory circle" format](http://archiveofourown.org/works/6163428), this should be familiar to you. It's a short form, 1st person perspective, with the first initial of the person telling it at the bottom of each section--either Link, Cloud, or Tifa. I initially thought of putting this into a more standard prose format, but the more I wrote of it, the more I decided to keep it as is. I may add something to this later on. 
> 
> This is a very emotional work.

_Another long day of fighting…_

_The room is dark, not even the moon is out, but he snuggles close to me, pressing his lips against my neck. “You went hard today,” he murmurs, dotting kisses from my neck down through my collarbone._

_“So did you.” I kiss his forehead, reaching over to tangle my hands in his hair. It’s gotten long, long enough to ponytail, and it suits him. I braid it every morning._

_How long has it been…? Time seems so meaningless here…_

_I feel as if I’ve gotten older, but I look the same, and so does he. It doesn’t matter, though, because in the end...we’re still here. We’re still together, after all this time._

_The thought makes me smile, and I nuzzle him enough to draw his face upward, close to mine, and I kiss him, kiss him. “I love you,” I say. “I love you so much…”_

_He giggles, that soft sound that’s music to my ears. “I love you too.”_

_We continue to kiss, and I feel his hand lace with mine, the hand adorned with a silver ring. I remember what he said to me that day, the day that he gave me this. “I want to always be by your side._

_No matter what happens.”_

_I squeeze his hand and kiss him deeper, and he moans, just slightly in the back of his throat. It shivers down my spine and I try to press myself closer, legs intertwined. I want to be close, close, close. It’s the sort of feeling that I never want to let go of, something I want to hold onto forever…_

_Our kissing is interrupted by a yawn. “Sorry,” he mutters. “I’m sleepy…”_

_“It’s okay,” I reply. “Get some rest.”_

_He lets go of my hand in favor of wrapping his arms around me, nuzzling into my chest. “Tomorrow morning,” he says. I bite my lip. Yeah, I can wait ‘til then. I should sleep too, anyway._

_I settle into the sheets and inhale the soft scent of his hair. Tomorrow, I’ll kiss you again…_

(C.)

* * *

 

_He finally came back._

_Out of all the places, we found him in Aerith’s church, passed out in the flower bed. It was Marlene who found him, Gods I’ve never seen her run so fast. Her and Denzel nearly tackled him when he woke up. I was so relieved._

_At first._

_He was really disoriented in the beginning, and he didn’t even recognize us when he saw us. I had to explain where he was and who I was to him. Gone for a year, without a peep, and now this. He seems to get it now, but he’s...distant._

_He won’t talk about where he went. He looks the same, for the most part. He never quite meets anyone’s eyes, though. There’s a ring on his finger, silver, and when I asked about it, he just said it was “a gift from a friend”. But, who?_

_He spent the first day and a half holed up in his room, writing in a journal. I want to read it, but...he keeps it under his pillow. Maybe it’s just for him. Damn it, Cloud, where were you? What did you see? What did you find?_

_He goes out on long motorcycle rides, which wouldn’t be unusual, but he does it a lot more frequently than he used to. He barely eats, and I don’t know how much he sleeps. Probably not much of that either. We’re all worried about him--the kids show it the most. They’ve grown shy around him, and it’s unsettling. It’s like his body came back, but_ he _didn’t._

_When he first got here, things seemed okay, and he was mildly social--as social as he ever was, which was questionable. After a couple days, however, he only spoke in negatives or affirmatives, nothing more elaborate, just the bare minimum to get through the day. I’ve sneaked up on him when he’s been alone, and he talks to himself--as well as makes strange motions with his hands. Rather, it’s as if he’s talking to someone who isn’t there. I can’t make out what he says, but there’s something he repeats a lot--”I miss you.”_

_Lately, though, he doesn’t talk at all._

(T.)

* * *

 

_I feel so empty._

_This doesn’t feel like home anymore. Funny, all I ever thought of when I first got there was how I was going to get back, and now that I’m here, all I want to do is escape. Irony’s a cruel mistress._

_The only thing I have to remind me that all of it was real is this ring on my finger--it came over, somehow. thankfully. I wrote down everything I could remember about my time in the mansion, just in case I forget. Just in case my old memories overlap and have to rewrite the others, like a computer program. I trace his face in my mind every day, every hour, every minute._

_I...should’ve known this was coming._

_There were challengers who came in one wave and were gone the next, and even though I tried my damnedest to push to the top, I still woke up in my “own” world. I guess it’s...similar enough to the one I left behind, but I’m never going to be sure._

_Gods, I miss you. If I’d have known, I would have given you a proper goodbye._

_But...maybe it’s easier this way._

_I can’t tell them about this. They just...wouldn’t understand. They would think that I went crazy, or something. So, I keep it to myself. I go out riding, I try to live this life that I had left behind, but it’s...hard. Now that I’ve tasted it, I want something more. My heart aches every day and I just…_

_I can see his smile in the back of my mind…_

_I can remember the fierceness in his eyes when he drew his sword…_

_I can still taste the way he kissed me…_

_There’s a knock on the door. “Cloud?” Tentative, worried, apprehensive. “Dinner’s ready.”_

_I don’t answer, if only to stifle the choking sounds I would be making if I did. I can’t stop the tears, though. They’re too familiar, running the same route down my cheeks. “Please come down,” she says again, before I hear her walk back down the stairs._

_This isn’t a way to live._

_Will I ever find a way back?_

_...If I enter the Lifestream, will I see him again?_

(C.)

* * *

 

_I’m not losing again._

_His things are still here. I dig through his drawers and put on the uniform he always used to wear--the sleeveless shirt, the suspender belt with those huge pants and boots, the shoulder guard, and his gloves. It’s a little snug on me, but it doesn’t matter. I can fit my sword on the back peg, even though it’s nowhere near as impressive looking._

_I look at myself in the mirror. What did he call this? SOLDIER 1st-class. It’s alien on me._

_I am going to find him._

_When we found out that he was gone, Samus and Zelda were kind enough to stay with me for the first couple days. More like...I was on a watch. This happened before, and I almost_ died, _even if by accident. Maybe they didn’t want it to be on purpose._

_Terrible...I shouldn’t think like that._

_It’s late, really late, and I sneak out of my room as quietly as I can in these clunky boots. It aches, just the same as when she left. When he disappeared. I hate how familiar it feels. I’m so tired of losing the ones I love, when I have to stay behind. I was the first to come, and the last to leave. Never to leave._

_I’m changing that tonight._

_Everywhere is empty and deserted, perfect for me to rush the halls, all the way to the end where the assist room is. Sure, they did fix the crack, but the seams are pretty well defined in the floor. And if I can see him, then maybe...just maybe...I can pull myself through. Or, just will myself to him._

_I spin the ring on my left hand. It’s the only connection to him I have left._

_There’s a hum in the assist room, as well as an odd air that hangs around it. It’s like the miasma, but not as strong. The crack is indeed patched up, but the marble podium is off-center. I walk up to it, and the hum gets louder, louder. There’s...something odd about this. I try to center it, but it keeps tilting back to how it was, stubborn. Finally, I pull the podium, heavy as it is, completely off where it sits, and purple light washes over me._

_There’s a hole right where it sat, the humming even louder than before, swarming with energy. My body feels heavy just being near it, but...I know this is the only way. I’m not even sure if it will work. And I’ve only got one shot._

_It’s always been able to sense who you want to see. So, if I focus, maybe it will pull me to him, to his world. I have to try. I have to._

_I get the feeling once I go in, I won’t be able to come back._

_I’m...scared._

_I grit my teeth and squeeze my eyes shut. I miss him so much, too much._

_“Cloud,” I mutter. “I’m coming home.”_

_I dig my hands deep into the hole, and the light swarms around me…_

(L.)

* * *

 

_I wake up in the streets of some town._

_Something feels off._

_I stand up, but I’m too low to the ground. The clothes I was wearing have slipped off my body, including my sword, and are heaped all around me. I look down at my feet. They’re paws, claws. The silver ring won’t fit, and I pick it up with my...teeth. My jaw feels longer, and my senses are heightened--I can smell and hear everything._

_I’m...a wolf._

_I shake myself off, leave everything behind, and patter through the streets, slinking about, as unnoticeable as I can make myself. I don’t know where I’m going, but it doesn’t seem to matter right now. The sky is overcast and dark, matching the cold streets and tall buildings around me._

_Yet, somehow I feel like I’m in the right place._

_A boy darts past me with a grocery bag in his arms._

_There’s a scent on him that hits me hard, it’s familiar right down to the base and I immediately follow him, my claws clicking against the pavement. He’s oblivious to my pursuit, even when he makes corners, but I make a point to keep a fair distance, just far enough to keep the scent. The ring clinks in my jaw, and my heart is racing with hope. I hope I’m not wrong. I hope I can find him here, and not just someone that looks like him, who calls himself Cloud._ Him.

_The boy slows down in front of an apartment, and I dart right behind him, so when he opens the door, I’m nearly at his side. A little girl is there to help, but she spots me first, eyes wide with a gasp. “Doggie!” she exclaims._

_The boy turns, confused, then jumps. “Ah! Where’d you come from?”_

_The little girl immediately pats me on the head, scratching my ears. “Oh, it’s a nice doggie!” she coos. I didn’t realize how tense I was until she started petting me, and I relax a little. I feel my tail wag behind me. “It even has pretty earrings that match its eyes!”_

_“What’s going on?” A young woman comes to the door now, thick in every aspect with deep eyes. “A stray…?”_

_“I-it followed me home, Tifa…” the boy says, shuffling his feet._

_“Can we keep it? Please?” the girl begs, pouting and holding me around the neck._

_The lady he called Tifa looks torn, and I can already feel in my throat that I can’t speak to say anything, to explain. I can’t even sign now. But, when the door opens further, his scent grows stronger. Didn’t he talk about a girl named Tifa that he knew? I have to be close._

_Please…_

_She sighs and opens the door fully, waving us inside. “Okay, just for a bit, though. Until we can--”_

_“Yay!” the girl exclaims, running inside, pulling me by the scruff of my neck. “Come here, doggie!”_

_As soon as we’re inside, I shake her off and begin sniffing around, trying to trail more of his scent. “He’s awful big for a dog,” I hear Tifa say. “Denzel, you should be more careful…”_

_The stairs are where I catch his scent again, and I leave their voices behind as I scamper up them, speed in my favor on four legs. I feel more sure now, my tongue hangs out the more anxious I get. Is it you? Is it you? I know I’m not the same, I’m not even human anymore, but_

_just to see you...will be enough._

_Will be worth it._

_There’s only one door at the top of the stairs, closed, and I paw at it, whining through my nose. There’s shuffling behind it, and I become more persistent, jumping up on my hind legs to scratch. I leave claw marks in the wood, but it doesn’t matter. Come out, come out, come out…_

_He opens the door._

_I can’t stop my tail from wagging because it’s_ him, _that spiked blonde hair, those glowing eyes, even though his face is drawn and tired I know, I know and I want to jump on him and hug him but I can’t, I can’t because he’s looking at me confused, perplexed. “What?” he whispers, kneeling down to eye level. Are my eyes the same? He’s studying them and I want to melt. He runs a hand over my head, and I nuzzle into it. There’s only one way I can let him know._

_I drop the ring at his knees._

_He picks it up, with the hand that his ring is on, and rolls it in his fingers, even though it’s covered in my slobber. I can hear a clicking sound in the back of his throat, as if he’s struggling to breathe. When he looks at me again, there are tears in his eyes._

_“L-Link?” he stammers._

_I bark in approval._

_He embraces me around my neck, kisses right behind my ear, and pets me. I would be crying too, if I could, but instead I whine, a paw on his shoulder, because I made it, I made it…_

(L.)

* * *

 

_I’m...still trying to get this straight._

_This...dog, this wolf that followed Denzel home that day...Cloud knows it. Knows him. Used to be human._

_I’m staring at him as he lays at my feet, curled up and dozing quietly. He’s gentle around the kids, but especially around Cloud...he didn’t leave him alone the first day or so. That day, they went out for a walk and came home with a pile of clothes--a 1st-class uniform and a sword. “Must’ve brought it over,” was all he said. He talks to him more than he will even to me, and the wolf just wags his tail, sometimes barks. I’m a...little worried, I’m not going to lie._

_I slide off the couch, sit cross-legged right in front of him, and scratch behind his ears. They flick, and he wakes up with a yawn. His fur is coarse beneath my fingertips, but it’s comforting in a way. He makes a small growl in greeting, then cocks his head intently._

_Ah. I look around--the kids are with Barret today, so it’s just me for now. I speak low. “Your name’s...Link, right?”_

_He nods. Normal wolves--or dogs, for that matter--don’t do that. But he’s no Red, he won’t talk. We’ll see how this goes. Yes or no questions only. “You’re...pretty close to Cloud, huh?” I ask._

_His tail wags, and gives a little yelp. I smile in response, weak as it is. “You’re not from this world, are you?” I ask, continuing to pet his head._

_Link shakes his head._

_“And...neither is Cloud.” I bite my lip, unable to look anywhere but the floor. “Neither is Cloud, right?”_

_He lays down, head on his paws with a gentle whining sound. No, Cloud’s not. I was so excited to see him when he was home, but the combination of his amnesia and his distance made me not so sure._

_There’s something else…_

_I pet him one last time before standing up and heading back to my bedroom. I shuffle through my jewelry box on my dresser, and pull out an earring. It’s a wolf, with a ring in its mouth. Before he left on that long, long ride, he...gave it to me. “Proof that I’ll come home,” he said. I can still feel his hand on my cheek. His lips on mine._

_The Cloud we found passed out in the church still wears that earring, when I know he only had one._

(T.)

* * *

 

_“Can I ask you something?”_

_The question comes suddenly, over dinner, the four of us at the table. Link’s under the table, his head on my feet, but he perks up when she speaks. “Sure,” I reply._

_She looks over at Denzel and Marlene. “Go upstairs you two,” she says. “Cloud and I need to talk alone.”_

_Denzel nods silently and shuffles away, and Marlene follows suit, darting up the stairs ahead of him. When she hears the door shut upstairs, she finally turns back to me. “You still...haven’t told me where you went,” she asks._

_I shake my head, a humorless smirk on my lips. “You wouldn’t believe me if I told you,” I mutter._

_“Well, you told me this wolf here used to be a human and followed you here, so…” There’s such exasperation in her voice and it stings, every bite of her words sting. She shrugs and sighs, crossing her arms. “I bet you I’ll believe anything at this point.”_

_Gods, trying to explain all of this...hell, when I have a hard time remembering it myself. Being here has really messed with my head--it’s like there are constantly gaps that keep trying to get themselves filled. Tifa will tell me something, or Denzel, and it’s as if my mind is creating the memory on the fly. Is it real? How do I know for sure?_

_And then some things don’t come back._

_And I always get the same look._

_“I was...ripped from here,” I start thickly. “I got dropped...in a fighting tournament. With others from different worlds. It was…” What did Zelda call it? “A space between dimensions, or something…”_

_“So...you were made to fight?” she clarifies._

_“Yeah. No one ever got hurt. It was for fun.” I tilt my head and scratch the back of it. “I met a bunch of people there. Like Link...except he wasn’t a wolf. He was my roommate.”_

_My throat chokes on the word “roommate”. It might’ve been what we started out as, but we’re...so much more than that now. Looking at her face, though, I can’t bring myself to say “we were lovers”, like I want to. For one, the dissonance would be too great. And second…_

_There’s a certain way that she looks at me, a tenderness in her auburn brown eyes. I never remembered her looking at me like that before, unless I just never noticed. But I notice it now. Because I’ve seen the same look._

_In a different color._

_“Cloud,” she asks me, slipping her hands under the table. “Do you remember what you said to me when you left a year ago?”_

_I open my mouth and close it again. “I…” I don’t. My memory of this place is in fragments, broken pieces that don’t quite fit together, and digging back before I entered the Smash mansion is exhausting._

_My silence should be answer enough, but she continues. “Do you...remember what you promised me?”_

_Her voice cracks. When our eyes meet, hers are glassy, shivering to break._

_She gets up and walks upstairs._

_I sigh deep and rest my head on the table. Beneath, Link whines and rests his head on my lap, and I pet him. He nuzzles my hand. I’m so sorry, Tifa. This...this must be how Link felt after what happened with Zelda._

_I’m not her Cloud._

_And the fact that I got dropped here, into this world specifically, makes me wonder about what happened to hers…_

(C.)

* * *

 

_I wake up to the sound of Marlene crying. “Sweetie, what happened? What’s wrong?” Tifa says._

_I jump out of bed and run downstairs, where she stands with an empty leash in her hand and her face blotchy red. “S-s-s-some mean people...stole our doggie!” she cries._

_My heart freezes, and I can’t breathe. Someone kidnapped Link? Tifa glances at me for a second, then hugs Marlene. “What did they look like?” she asks._

_"_ _Th-they l-looked like...d-doctors…” she manages to stammer, before wailing into Tifa’s shoulder._

 _“Shinra.” Tifa glances up to me with narrowed eyes. “I didn’t think there were any of_ that _type left.”_

_“I have to go,” I say. My hands are shaking. Link did all of this to get here, I’m not going to let some dirty scientists rip him away and make him their lab rat._

(like they did to me)

_I swallow hard and run upstairs, changing into my normal clothes. It’s a uniform I had in the Smash house, but I didn’t wear it often. It feels...right, but...different. I automatically look for my sword but then I remember: it’s in my bike. The Buster Sword is rusting in a church. This sword, my new one, is with Fenrir._

_By the time I get downstairs, she’s already ready to go. “You’re coming?” I ask._

_“Of course I’m coming,” she replies. “I texted Barret, he’ll be here to watch them. Don’t just stand there, come on!”_

_I shake my head and run out the door, around the corner to where my bike is parked. She gets on the back as soon as I start it up, but I hesitate before pulling out to the alley. This isn’t Midgar. This is Edge, and I haven’t even been to Midgar since I got back--I’ve only ridden around the countryside. “I need you to tell me where to go,” I ask. I wince as I say it. It’s just another sign that I don’t belong here._

_I hear her sigh through her nose. “Okay. If Shinra’s got him, he’d be in their underground labs in what’s left of Midgar. Head out of Edge’s limits and we’ll go from there.”_

_I nod and rev the engine, spinning out into the street. This is also another fragmented memory, out of place, but it settles in more easily in my mind--I don’t really remember this bike, or the sword that lies within it, but its familiarity is palpable. The gears shift fluidly, it hums beneath me and I feel free, I can feel calm even though my blood has boiled into pure adrenaline. Why, why would they take you? Has someone been watching us? Do they know Link isn’t from here? Is this a cruel trick from Master Hand, reaching across dimensions to punish him for leaving?_

_Link said he was one of the first ones pulled into the house. He thought he would never leave. So much time went by, us in our places, that we thought we would_ never _leave. That’s why it was so easy to promise ourselves to each other._

_I can feel the ring beneath my riding gloves, and I wear his on my other hand since he doesn’t have a hand to wear it. Even if I won’t be able to kiss him in the same way again, I’ll still keep that promise._

_“Cloud, head east from here.”_

_I turn onto the winding road, the desecrated ruins of Midgar ahead of me. I’m coming…_

(C.)

* * *

 

_The underground maze of these labs was a nightmare to begin with--he kept muttering to himself, always a half step ahead of me. “What if he’s dead. What if he’s dead.” His voice shook with every word and pushed him further ahead until finally, finally, we found what we were looking for._

_But even I don’t feel relieved--_

“Link!”

_He yelps like a wounded animal and runs over to the stasis tube--this certainly isn’t the wolf that came home with him, but a grown man asleep and hooked up with wires. Even through the transparent, green-blue liquid, his long blonde hair floats and shimmers, freckles over his face and shoulders. Cloud presses his face against the glass, his gloves squeaking as they run over it. “I-I’m getting out out, hold still--”_

_He pulls his sword out from behind him and slices it against the tube, making me jump. “Don’t! Let me try and find something--” I shout, running over to a panel in the back._

_T_ _he commotion has drawn some attention, as a couple people in lab coats come running down the hall. “Someone’s broken in!” they yell as I skim my fingers over the countless buttons and dials. “Hey! You!”_

_Cloud grunts and there’s a huge crashing sound as mako spills from the vial, releasing Link from his prison. He catches him in his arms and holds him there, sword hand on the ground while his other shakes as he strokes his back. There’s no time to watch this, and I don’t think I’d be able to anyway…_

_I square off in front of the scientists and crack my knuckles. “What the hell is this, anyway?” I taunt, rushing forward. “You’d think you bastards would’ve had enough of this--”_

_I punch one in the gut, rendering him useless, but another darts around me over to Cloud. “Forget about her, just get the test subject!” the scientist shouts. I whirl around, just in time to see Cloud pick his head up,_

_and there’s a deranged light in his eyes--_

“Don’t fucking touch him!” _he bellows. He spins his sword around in his hand and stabs the scientist right in the chest. There’s no hesitation. I cry out as blood sprays from his back and he collapses on the ground. Cloud doesn’t seem too phased as he rises, Link still in his arms, and goes for the one coughing on the ground._

_I’ve never...seen him kill so recklessly. “C-Cloud, wait--!”_

_He doesn’t hear me. He screams and plunges his sword deep into the other scientist, red staining his white lab coat. I think...I think I’m going to be sick, with the blood and the squelching sound when he rips it out of his chest. He’s panting. Eyes wide. He’s...starting to whimper._

_“A-ah...aaaah…”_

_The sword falls from his hand and he drops to his knees. He holds Link close to his chest, then lifts his head. “Link? Link…” he whines. He swallows hard, grips Link’s cheek, and shakes it. “P-please…”_

_Link’s eyes flutter open. They’re glowing bright blue, the same shade that Cloud’s eyes are, except hazy, drenched in mako. “C…” he starts weakly. “C-Cloud…”_

_He passes out again, and his body soon erupts into a coat of dark gray fur. Within seconds, he’s turned back into the wolf I remember, and Cloud drops his head into his fur, gripping it with his back shaking. I take a few steps back, wet under my boots from the swirling of blood and mako, and lean against the wall._

_It’s taking every inch of strength I have left in my body to hold myself together. I feel it in my core as I hug my stomach, as I cover my mouth to hold back anything, anything that could come out_

_and I let Cloud’s silent sobs fill the deserted lab…_

(T.)

* * *

 

_After about an hour, we made it back home._

_Tifa helped me wash the mako off Link’s fur in the bathtub. She hasn’t spoken a word to me since we left, not even since she went to bed. I carried him upstairs, and he’s sleeping in bed with me._

_I’m exhausted._

_I’ll have to put my things in the wash, now that they’re covered in blood and mako. I roll over and hug him to my chest. He still smells like him, even with that wet dog overtone. The tears are coming back. I thought I didn’t have any left. Gods, my eyes hurt from it. I’m just glad he’s okay. But, this isn’t over yet. It’s not._

_When we got back, there was an envelope lying on the kitchen table. There was no name on it, but the red, wax seal had the logo from the Smash mansion on it. I ripped it open immediately, and its message was short--_

_“LINK MUST RETURN._

_ONE WAY OR ANOTHER._

_NO EXCEPTIONS.”_

_Remembering it makes my stomach turn, and I clutch him again. I don’t want to wake anyone up. No exceptions. I’m afraid--I don’t know what I went through to get here. I just woke up in the church_

_in...Aerith’s church…_

_a bed of flowers by a pool of water…_

_I wonder…_

_Link kicks his legs, beginning to stir. He whines, and I’m thankful that the glow in his eyes is gone. “You’re okay,” I murmur. He begins to lick the salty tears off my face, and I squint and instinctively wrestle away from his long tongue. “Th-they had you, but...y-you’re here...with me, now…”_

_He growls low in his throat and attempts to hug me with his front paws; clumsy, but the intent is still there. “They--Master Hand wants you back,” I say, swallowing hard. “N-no...no exceptions...they’ll...they might kill you t-to do it…”_

_Another whimper, another lick to my face. “We’ll...figure it out.” I sigh and shake my head, rubbing my eyes with the back of my hand. “I’m...s-so tired…”_

_He flails to try and unlatch from me, but I help him so he can curl up beside me, tucked right by my stomach. I pet his head, scratching behind his ears in a rhythmic way. And right before I drift off, when my hand tires and my eyes get heavy, I hear something from him, something that sounds like words…_

_“Sleep.”_

(C.)

* * *

 

_He won’t look at me. Of course he won’t look at me, right after he says that he’s leaving. “Why?” I ask._

_“I have to,” he replies. “They’re taking Link dead or alive, and I’d rather it be alive, and I’d rather be with him.”_

_You come back, you come back after being gone for so Gods damned long, and_ now _this is what you do? My throat is burning. “Where do you think you’re even going to go?” My heart is racing, and every word that comes out of my mouth feels like I can barely control it, like dogs escaping from a pound. “How do you even know...how to...to…”_

_He swallows, his voice low and steady. “Aerith’s church.”_

_“How do you know that?”_

_“I just know.”_

_His stupid, calm voice irritates me so much. “Yeah? You ‘just know’?”_

_“Tifa, I can’t stay.”_

_“Who says you can’t?! Who says, huh?” I gesture to the kitchen around us. “You have everything here! You have a family to take care of, you have us!” You have me, I want to say, you have me, but does he even care anymore? Does he?_

_He shakes his head. “Listen--”_

_“No,_ you _listen! You can’t just fuck off after all this time! What about what you promised me?!” There are tears in my eyes and I run up to him and shake him, shake him. Damn it, look at me, Cloud, look at me!_

_But he won’t…_

_“I-I don’t remember, Tifa, I don’t!” Now his voice is getting louder. “I’m not_ from _here, you’ve got to know that by now! My home is back in that mansion!”_

_“Your home is here!” I retort. “Your home is here!”_

_“So I stay and let him die?” he snaps. “I’m not going to lose him again and leave him all alone--”_

_“Oh, but you’ll do that for me? For Marlene? For Dezel? You’re so fucking selfish!”_

_“I’m--!” He huffs in frustration, trying to squirm away from me, Gods, you never used to do this, what happened to you? Where’s the Cloud I know? Where is he? Show me, damn it! “You want me to just waste away in this house? For fuck’s sake, I can barely keep anything straight in my head--”_

_“You wouldn’t, we’re here to--”_

_“No, no!” he shouts. “You ask me to remember things, and_ I can’t! _Those kids look at me l-like I’m a stranger, and you do too! Don’t deny that.”_

_This is when he finally looks me in the eye._

_Those cool, blue eyes…_

_They’re the same…_

_But are they? Are they?_

_...Are they?_

_“Don’t deny that,” he repeats, and his voice shakes this time. “I don’t belong here.”_

_“B-but…” Oh Gods, I’m selfish too. “Wh-what am I going to do?”_

_He doesn’t have a reply for me, and I don’t expect one._

(T.)

* * *

 

_“Link. Wake up.”_

_His voice is a whisper in my ear, and accompanied by a kiss to my head. He’s dressed and standing right above me, moonlight shining in the window and casting a shadow over me. “We’re leaving,” he whispers. There’s a bag slung over his shoulder and I can see the hilt of my sword peeking out of it._

_Leaving? In the dead of night? I flick my ears and stretch. I know...he wants to try and go with me to have me come back. I’m grateful--I wouldn’t want to go back without him. Back to that empty dorm room, with a bed that’s too big for just one. He seems to know where he came out, so there might be a portal there. There’s no guarantee that we’ll make it back in one piece, or in the same place. But, if I managed to make it here, and now Master Hand wants me back, well…_

_...anything can happen._

_But there’s still a knot in my stomach leaving in secrecy. He creeps down the stairs and I follow suit, my claws clicking against them. I heard them arguing earlier. Does he think that this will hurt her any less? I know he feels guilty. He feels so guilty about doing this. He cried into my neck after that fight, wishing it didn’t have to be this way, but that he’s afraid…_

_...to stay without me._

_Cloud…_

_The house is dark and silent, and he pauses at the front door to look back into it. I sit at his feet and wait patiently. I can’t quite read his face, but I’m sure he’s saying his last goodbyes. He sighs deeply. “C’mon,” he mutters, then heads out the door._

_His motorcycle is parked right beside the house, and he wheels it down the street. “Don’t want to start it here. It’ll make too much noise.” So, he really wants to leave in complete secrecy. The others will wake up, and he’ll be gone again. He chose to come with me, instead of stay with them. They were nice people, and they treated us both so kindly...but I’m still glad he came with me._

_Is that selfish?_

_Was there any way to compromise?_

_We’re a few blocks down, but I can still see the house from where we are. There’s one light on at the top floor. So much for leaving without a sound. I jump ahead of him to get his attention. “What is it?” he asks._

_My tail falls flat, and tucks around my leg. No, it might be for the better if he didn’t realize. Instead, I walk right to his side, rubbing my snout against his hip. He puts the bike out on its kickstand and kneels by my side. “You okay?” he asks, scratching behind my ears._

_Being in this form is the only time I wish I could talk, or at least communicate. I can’t even sign to him, but I lick his face and just nod, before shaking him off and trotting ahead._

_The first light of dawn is on the horizon when he gets on the bike. “Hop on,” he says. The seat isn’t much, but I manage to sit steady on it, digging my claws into the leather._

_The engine revs loud in the streets at the witching hour…_

(L.)

* * *

 

_He’s gone again._

_Of course he left when everyone was asleep…_

_I asked him to sleep on it, just to think about what to do, but I guess...I guess he already knew. Hasn’t he...always been like that?_

_I’ve been up all night, twirling his earring between my fingers. Now, it’s the only thing I have left from him. I was waiting before, but now I know...now I feel something more sure._

_Cloud Strife will never come back here._

_Knowing doesn’t make it hurt any less._

_Knowing doesn’t stop the tears, or the shaking._

_Knowing won’t reconcile broken promises._

_“Ti,” he said to me. “When I come back, we’ll start our lives together.”_

_And he gave me this earring, this earring that I drop on the floor. It clatters with a loud, hideous sound._

_Cloud Strife will never come back home._

_I hug my arms to my chest and drop to my knees, just as pale light enters the window. There’s so much I never told him, there’s so much I wanted to say. Every day that’s passed so far, I’ve been hoping, and it’s not just me, it’s Marlene, it’s Denzel, it’s even Barret. I’ll never forget the day when Denzel asked me when Dad was coming home. And I have to be the one to tell him that he won’t._

_Given...that I_ haven’t _heard anything, there may be a chance…_

_But why would a different Cloud be sent here, if there was already one here and alive to begin with? What was the point? Was it just to tease me? I cover my face with my hands in an attempt to catch the tears, but they keep falling, falling like rain and…_

_...my phone starts to ring._

_I look up, slowly, slowly, as it vibrates on my dresser._

_Is it the call I’m hoping for? Or the call I’m dreading?_

_Cloud Strife isn’t coming home…_

_I’m scared to answer…_

(T.)

* * *

 

_The church is exactly how I left it._

_It’s been completely abandoned, the entire roof gone, but toward the back, there’s a patch of wildflowers surrounding a huge, rusted sword. It’s the Buster Sword. Tifa said I moved it from where he died to here for a proper memoriam._

_Link is sniffing around the entire place, and he barks to grab my attention. He stands by a puddle of water, too large to step over. Is it a puddle, though? It looks massively deep and dark, and I can’t tell if it’s the time of day tricking my eyes or…_

_Or…_

_Wait…_

_A deep, purple light flickers from deep inside the pool. It reminds me of what I saw in the assist room. This has to be the place, where the portal is. Link sniffs it further, dipping a paw in, and it shines brighter, causing him to yelp. “This is it,” I mutter, taking off the bag and setting it beside the pool. I kneel in front of him, running my fingers through his coarse fur. “You ready to head home?”_

_He nods and yips, but his ears are folded back. “Are you scared?” Another nod. “I...am too. I hope we get back together.”_

_He scoots closer to me, enough so I can hug him. “I-if...this is the last time I see you--”_

_He barks in my ear, and it’s loud, sharp enough for me to fall backwards. “Cripes!” I yelp, laughing nervously at the same time. “Okay, okay, I won’t say that…”_

_Link wags his tail and walks on top of me, licking my face. “H-hey, hey, stop that…” I’m relieved though. He wouldn’t want to make this too serious, would he?_

_If this were the last time he saw me, he’d want to go with a smile on my face…_

_I push him off and kneel in front of the pool. “Now or never,” I say. My heart is pounding as I stare into that crackling, purple light. “We’ll...go together.”_

_He barks an affirmative, and wanders off for a second to drag the bag over and drop it into the pool. It sinks immediately. I guess that’s one way to speed things up._

_I hold him by the scruff of the neck. “Okay,” I mutter, my voice trembling. “One, two...three.”_

_With a deep breath, I pull him to the side, and our combined weight makes us topple into the pool, and we sink…_

_It feels like water, and I hold my breath and squeeze my eyes shut as we float down, down, down. I can feel his paws flail in front of me, and I open one eye. He’s still a wolf, and I clamp my hand over his jaw--I don’t know how easy it is for him to do the same as me. The light from above fades_

_as we leave this world behind_

_and go back home…_

_Force from below wrenches me by the feet, and I’m ripped away from him, just as his face begins to change, and I’m surrounded by white light--_

(C.)

* * *

 

_The next time I’m aware, I’m coughing on a marble floor. My vision spins and I’m on all fours, Gods, I feel like I’m going to throw up…_

_But I don’t, and I manage to focus in front of me. The double doors...the dome shape of the ceiling...the warm lighting...I spin around to see a marble podium tipped over behind me, white light shining up from where it should be. This is it. This is the assist room._

_Where’s Link?_

_I whip my head around even though it gives me vertigo, oh Gods, no, no, where is he, where’s Link? He was the one who had to come back, did he not make it? Panic seizes my chest. “Link?” I choke. Trying to stand is not an option, I’m still dizzy, but I try and scan everywhere I can, find him, find Link, whether he’s a wolf or back to normal or what…_

_Please, please...where are you…?_

_A whistle from behind. “Up here!”_

_That_

_voice…_

_My heart stops for a second as I slowly, slowly turn around._

_I never...thought I’d see_ him _again, not after Master Fortress,_

_but there he is,_

_grinning down at me with Link in his arms. “Sheesh, this guy’s heavy,” he says. Link’s wearing a 1st-class uniform, his sword on his back, hair ponytailed back and unconscious. Oh, thank Gods…_

_Zack has an aura around him that’s nearly blinding, I can barely look at him right in the face, but he steps down and rests Link into my arms while I’m on my knees. “Figured we got him to you the first time, might as well get him back,” he says with a chuckle. He reaches out and ruffles my hair. “You take care of yourself, y’hear me?”_

_“Z...Zack…” I manage to say, short of breath as if I had run a marathon. He just salutes me walking back up. There’s a flash of pink behind him, and I can see a woman there, and she waves to me…_

_Aerith…_

_Propping Link’s head up with one hand, I reach out with the other, wait, wait just a second...let me say…_

_...thank you…_

_But I can’t talk, and all I get to see is white wings before the light vanishes and the room settles to a warm dark. They helped Link get to me...and they helped him back…_

_A hand on my face…_

_I look down…_

_“C-Cloud,” Link whispers, weak, but still there, still alive, here with me, in this strange world that we now call home._

_He smiles at me. I adjust him in my arms and I kiss him, I kiss him so deeply…_

_We’re home…_

(C.)

_...END._

**Author's Note:**

> [5/21/16, 10:57:23 PM] clink brigade leader: why did i write this
> 
> EDIT 5/22: The last three sections of this work have been cut. [They have been saved here for legacy.](http://supershadsy.tumblr.com/private/144756693202/tumblr_o7l5cpYY6b1trvvkd)


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